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    Main | Apple Unveils The "iDR" In Time For Holidays »
    Thursday
    Mar202008

    For Man Named Logan, When Women Hit 30, He’s On The Run

    iStock_000004356471XSmall.jpg(Glendale, CA) Spring, it’s a time when life is born anew, a time when love is in full bloom. But this year for Logan Harper it’s a time to end a love affair. For almost two hours, Logan has been searching for the right words to break-up with his girlfriend of two years, Sara.

    “I got it,” said Harper, while trolling MATCH.COM for a new lover. “Sara, you’re turning 30, so you gotta go….Logan’s done.”

    Logan, 35, was named for Michael York’s character in the futuristic movie from the past Logan's Run. In the movie, York’s society keeps its number small and strong by sacrificing individuals on their 30th birthday.

    Harper has infused that plot into his own love life; each time a girlfriend turns 30, he gives them the boot.

    “I thought he was just kidding,” said recently dumped Sara. “But now I have to find a new place to live...I really don’t know what else to say, other than I’m a little embarrassed. And that Logan’s a jackass, because I was just about to hit my sexual prime.”

    Logan says it is Sara who is making a jackass out of herself. "No one wants to listen to the ramblings of an old woman. What people, or more to the point men, want to hear are the likes and dislikes of say, a 25 year-old nurse/former exotic dancer in Encino."

    Logan's other ex-girlfriends feel bad for him and say he's heading down the wrong path. "He's making a mistake living the way he does," said Julie H., a lawyer who dated Logan until her 30th birthday. "Because one day he's going to wake up old and alone."

    "Julie might be right," added Logan. "But she and my other ex-girlfriends are missing the point. I like being alone, except when I'm having sex. And I only like to have sex with women under 30....To tell the truth, this whole Logan's Run thing was just a gimmick to help me score more tail....Now if you would get the hell out of my apartment, I have to send a picture of my junk to that nurse in Encino.”

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