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    « I'm Glad I'm Old, Cause You're F*cked | Main | Dramatic Farewell Ill-Planned »
    Saturday
    Apr282007

    Wife's Will To Live, A Little Annoying

    Gary240x359.jpg(Little Rock, AR) Retired dentist Gary Wilson loves his wife of thirty years, Linda. She helped him through dental school, gave him two beautiful daughters; and over their life together, she's been there for him. So when Linda was diagnosed with lung cancer, Gary was glad for the opportunity to be there for her.

    "She's my sweetheart, and I admire her will to live. But after 8 years of countless procedures, surgeries and treatments, it's a little annoying," said Gary. "I mean, we used to have a big house, a big 401k and a big lake house; but thanks to you know who's medical bills, that's all history."

    Gary isn't the only one who's annoyed with Linda's will to live. "Linda is a real gem. But I've got other patients, who haven't maxed-out their insurance," said Linda's oncologist Dr. Keller. "Plus, I'm writing a book on the dangers of lung cancer, and she's kind of fucking up my numbers."

    "Let's face some facts," said Gary. "The Big C will ultimately win, right? And when that happens Linda will be in Heaven, where she won't have to worry about food or rent. But someone down here, named Gary, will have to worry about those things."

    Even though it looks rough for Linda, she does have two allies, her daughters Lucy and Kimmy. "Mom is the strongest person in the world," said Lucy.

    Kimmy added, "We plan to support, love and take care of her for however long she wants to fight."

    Gary said the girls are just kissing ass to get Linda's jewelry. "But I know something they don't. There isn't any jewelry. It's long gone, just like my lake house."

    Aint' love grand.

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    Reader Comments (1)

    cheis the url - google things is working

    April 28, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterxvala

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