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    Thursday
    Jun192008

    Russert Nails God During A Heavenly Meet The Press

    God_Russert.jpg(Pearly Gates) Less than a week after his untimely passing, Tim Russert was back in his chair hosting a special Heavenly version of Meet The Press.

    His guest: The Almighty.

    Before the interview a few pleasantries passed between the Creator of Heaven and Earth and the former NBC news Washington Bureau Chief. But when the lights went up, it was all business.

    “Let’s get started…Lord, what’s the deal with the platypus?” asked Russert. “I mean, it’s a creature that’s part duck, part beaver, part otter and part chicken…Why?”

    “Wow…I, uh, don’t know really how to answer that…I figured that you would ask me about Creation, the Holy Ghost or why I let bad things happen, but you want to know about the platypus.....So, let’s talk about the platypus….The reason that it looks the way it does is…because…I was trying to create something interesting,” answered the Prime Mover.

    “Interesting?…okay,” said Russert before opening a manila folder. “Would it come as a shock to you that we have reports from the Creation that say that the platypus was not an intentional creation, but a mish-mash of left over parts?”

    “Wow, it is hot under these lights. Isn’t it?” asked God clearly starting to sweat. “Are you hot? You’ve got to be hot. I’m burning up. And I’m God.”

    “I’m okay,” pushed Russert. “The platypus, planned or leftovers?”

    “Well the truth is…what I meant to do was something interesting," said Yahweh. "But it was so late. It was day six and I was just zapped you know? I had just created everything, almost everything. I still needed one more mammal for Australia, so I might have just grabbed whatever was lying around and put it together with some Hallelujah dust.”

    “So it was leftovers,” asked Russert.

    “Yes. It was,” added the Alpha and the Omega. "You know. You're every bit as tough as St. Peter said you were."

    After the show ended, Russert and the Supreme Being talked about how proud they were of their sons and the state of the NFL. Before leaving to listen to some prayers, God told Tim that he’d see what he could do about getting his beloved Buffalo Bills a little help this season.

    This Sunday, the Heaven edition of Meet The Press moves to its regular time slot at 8 HST. Scheduled to appear are Abraham Lincoln and Stephen A. Douglas. Go get’em Tim.

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    Reader Comments (3)

    I don't pay to much mind to the political talking heads, so not familiar with who Tim Russert was, but have to say enjoyed the mock interview with the Almighty----I do love a good sense of sarcasm.

    June 23, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGaryJay

    I didn't really watch Tim Russert that much, but I bet wherever he wakes up there will be applause.

    June 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterVictor Penro

    "I'm burning up. And I'm God." Classic.

    July 17, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCube Jungle

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